Navigating Currents of Change: Finding Meaning Through Family and Community
In this episode of聽Unstoppable Stories, Jeannie Lum joins host Lauren Cardillo to share her story of resilience, compassion, and cultural connection. Born in the Philippines and raised as a military kid, Jeannie鈥檚 journey has been defined by movement, adaptability, and heart. When her father decided to stop relocating their family, Jeannie learned the power of staying grounded, keeping connected through collect calls, calling cards, and even pottery, a creative bond she still treasures today.
Now living in Oahu, Hawaii with her two autistic daughters, Jeannie balances motherhood, advocacy, and her role聽as a former聽Outreach Partnership Specialist at t 黑料社区. She opens up about embracing challenges, finding purpose through community, and learning to let the rhythm of life, like the ocean, carry her forward.
Jeannie鈥檚 story is a reminder that strength isn鈥檛 just about perseverance; it鈥檚 about leading with love, embracing culture, and staying rooted no matter where the tide takes you.
Episode Information
Lauren Cardillo
Your fingers in lots of different pots. How do you not burn out?
Jeannie Lum
What keeps me going is remembering why I do it. And if it doesn't make sense to me, or if it's just something that I know is not going to be life giving and or, you know, life giving back to the person that I am serving or supporting. Then I have to reprioritize.
Narrator
Welcome to the UMGC podcast Unstoppable Stories with your host Lauren Cardillo
Lauren Cardillo
Today I'm joined by Jeannie Lum Currently, you are a mom, you work in community outreach and you live on the island of Oahu in Hawaii. First thing I just have to say, because anyone listening is going to ask you, how's the weather today any different from any other day?
Jeannie Lum
It is gorgeous. Blue skies, shining sun. So I.
Lauren Cardillo
Love it. So just going on your background, you know, you're in Hawaii. You grew up there. You were born in the Philippines. Part of the military family. You have, like, this very global background. And yet your calling is community outreach. So tell me how that happened. Tell me why that's so important to you.
Jeannie Lum
Yeah. Thank you so much. I don't know if I would also describe it as a global background, but let's just say that I've been doing the best I can to have a global background. My father is a United States retired United States Marine, and that time he took my mom and I from the Philippines after I was born and we lived in, California.
Jeannie Lum
He was stationed there for about 4 to 5 years. And then we moved to Hawaii. And he's loved the environment, the culture, and just being out here in Hawaii in general. However, my father, he you know, with his calling in the military, he was stationed everywhere Okinawa, South Carolina, back to California. He even went to Iraq. And he was also in Somalia as well.
Jeannie Lum
And, but he chose to not take us along with him to the different station posts because he really, again, enjoyed the the vibe out here in Hawaii. And he felt like, you know, this is where I want my family to grow. Of course, that was definitely hard. And so as a result of, you know, of of just making sure we keep everything together and do everything together, you know, it's just that definitely curried up my need to want to stay connected with my father and just.
Jeannie Lum
And the birth of me wanting to. Defining the importance of connecting and staying connected to keep ties strong. And so, you know, we're always back. Then there was no messenger. We always had calling cards. We had cell phone bills. That or telephone bills, if you will, collect calls that were, like, costing so much money. But we tried to make sure we stayed connected with my dad, and, well, my dad was away.
Jeannie Lum
He would do things like, you know, take up ceramic classes and he would talk to me about him. And what he would do is he would build ceramic, figures, like dolls, and he would send them over to me and send me the paint. And then we talk about what he did and we'd paint them together over the phone.
Jeannie Lum
He would. He'd watch something on a video, you know, he'd watch something, when he would watch a movie. He would send me the VHS tape, and then he'd watch it as well. And then I would, you know, we'd talk about it over the phone. So, through that, through that course, it definitely instilled in me, like, you know, just the power of wanting that, you know, the power of connection, you know, the power of making sure that, you know, we keep family ties strong and, and, you know, you I when you talk about global, you know, I think a global mindset is always wanting to find a way to connect
Jeannie Lum
with others and connect with the world. And I'm just so grateful that it started with my family.
Lauren Cardillo
I love that. Do you still have the pots?
Jeannie Lum
I do, I actually, I don't have everything I do, just have one. It is a it's the doll. It's this doll and this beautiful, like colored pink. This pink was my favorite color. So that time. So. Yeah.
Lauren Cardillo
So while he was away though, you were also helping take care of your family.
Jeannie Lum
Yes, yes.
Lauren Cardillo
For, you know, young kid, not young young, but as a young adult teenager, what's the best way of saying where were you were in your life? That's another responsibility.
Jeannie Lum
While my dad was away, I was thrusted into the responsibility of being a second mother to my brother. So. And of course, helping my mom. It's not easy. Being a single parent, just it was technically a single parent having to, take care of two kids, driving them through all their, driving them to their different activities, helping them with schoolwork.
Jeannie Lum
And while she did have my dad over the phone, it's just something a bit different having both parents there. And, and then you, my mom, me did a lot of help. So, my brother and I are three years apart, and I had to be the one to kind of guide him through, you know, his his school years, and him just also embracing the opportunity of taking advantage of the resources around him and enjoying enjoying his life and, just being there for him as he was maturing as well.
Lauren Cardillo
What kind of effect do you think that had on you now, today that makes you want to reach out and help people?
Jeannie Lum
The effect that that had on me definitely was, very impactful because again, it started with my family, you know, having to push myself to stay connected with my father, who was far away, and now having to push myself to make sure that my brother, who didn't have the have the luxury of having both parents there for most of his, most of his life.
Jeannie Lum
Trusted me to, to make sure that, hey, you know, I want to make sure that I, I, I guide you here. I keep you connected with, with the community that get involved. I find myself being his life coach as well. And and it pushed me to continue to stay connected and, and volunteer and do all these different things to see what I can share back with my brother and guide him through all those lessons that I learned from everything that I do.
Jeannie Lum
I kind of give it back to him. So in a way, let's just say that I held the shovel and I was like digging the trenches for him to be able to kind of follow through and, and, and work with me and work and work through the world himself.
Lauren Cardillo
So now you've sort of taken that shovel to bigger trenches, right? Helping other people. I laughed when, I spoke to you, before when you said because of sort of your passion for community and helping people, your friends call you Miss Aloha.
Jeannie Lum
Yes.
Lauren Cardillo
So explain that one for people who don't, you know, sort of get it?
Jeannie Lum
Absolutely. So my passion to connect with many different people gave me that reputation of Miss Aloha with the people that I'm close with. And when they say misalucha so aloha is it just means a lot of things in in Hawaii culture. It is it is welcome. It is. Hello. It is. Sometimes it's also goodbye, but it's also an embrace of of.
Jeannie Lum
I like to look at it as a word that hugs and hugs everybody. It says hello. It says goodbye. It's as welcome as coming to my house. Come learn about me. I want to learn about you. So, Eddie, that person that I bring in front of people, the person that I share, just that wanting to just be there, wanting to step up to the plate, wanting to be able to see how I can help, see how I can help make things better, see how I could help shovel through their their own trenches, help build pathways, in whatever, in whatever sense that means.
Jeannie Lum
Gave me that that reputation with my friends.
Lauren Cardillo
And they're still good friends, right?
Jeannie Lum
They're still great friends. And this.
Lauren Cardillo
So how did that passion for learning, like you just said, lead you to, like, several degrees in college now working at a university. How did that sort of help you find what you wanted to do?
Jeannie Lum
Sometimes I like to think that my pathway has been I don't know if the right word is accidental or, you know, I just I wasn't expecting I'd be in the position where I am at now, where I'm doing a lot of outreach. I just simply followed something that I love to do naturally. You know, with, with my father being away and having to be the person to, to guide my brother and, I didn't go away for college as well.
Jeannie Lum
And because of that alone, like being wanting to be here to help my mom and to be there for my whole family, I said, okay, I'll go ahead and I'll stay here for college. You know, I had the option to to go away for school, but, you know, family was very important to me is very it's still very important to me.
Jeannie Lum
And the I said to myself, what are I gotta make the most out of it? Sure, I may not. I may or may not leave the island, but how do I make the most out of this? How do I make myself worldly? How do I make myself global? And so I definitely did my part to take advantage of, different activities in school.
Jeannie Lum
Having to, take on leadership roles within student government. So and then those roles brought me to our sister schools in Dayton, Ohio, in San Antonio. I was also in a school where a lot of international students were there as well. And so that also led me to want to connect with them and their cultures. We've had things like, you know, Pacific Island Review or International Extravaganza, and that thrusted and encouraged me even more to wanting to, you know, learn, learn that dance of that culture, have have conversations and that just opened my mind more.
Jeannie Lum
And I said to myself, you know, I cannot just because I stayed here on the island, I'm not gonna let myself feel like a rock, right? I'm gonna make sure that I you know, dance my way, if you will, to learn about other cultures, to learn about other people. And after after going to college here, of course, it opened up doors for me career wise.
Jeannie Lum
And in the cruise of, I found myself doing, our careers that are very mission driven. I was in nonprofit organizations, you know, and these nonprofit organizations varied from not only higher ed related or just, you know, or working with the youth, but also those who are, close to experiencing their end of life. So, you know, just finding myself shadowing, a nurse, who is helping a person through end of life just so that I can understand how I can share that message and the work that I do and for it, for the nonprofit that I was serving at that time.
Jeannie Lum
Definitely. It opened my mind a little bit more to not just cultures, but also life itself. And I also found myself in a for profit, global company, where I was the only representative out here where I also got to learn more about the different businesses out here, from small mom and pop shops to big to big supermarket chains here in Hawaii.
Jeannie Lum
And, and I mentioned about, you know, being able to understand different cultures and then different and being able to understand the, the, you know, the, the different stages of life, you know, in the work that I do. And then through this global work that I did, I was also able to understand, everyone's, you know, business acumen that everybody's financial status in life, you know, and so having to connect with a mom and pop shop who's just, you know, really then of the day, they know they're not going to be making $100,000 in a year.
Jeannie Lum
They're just happy making $30,000 in a year. But we're here to kind of help them and guide them and see how we can help them elevate their businesses more all the way to helping a supermarket strategize. So, so, you know, the entire my entire career has definitely, pushed me to just open my mind more on how else that connect can connect with people.
Jeannie Lum
It's not just a simple aloha or nice to meet you, but also where are you in life?
Lauren Cardillo
And not every not everybody does that. When I read the thing about, you know, you tagging along with people who are in poverty, hospice care, you know, so that is a somewhat different from what you do today. But.
Lauren Cardillo
Enriches you. It has to help people, you know, which is amazing. So you now do outreach pretty much for a living, right? Yes. Here at UNC. What does that mean? Like your day to day is like.
Jeannie Lum
So for MGC, I am what's called an outreach partnership specialist. And so the job that I do is pretty much making sure that we are connecting with our civilian population, the high school population, those who are, you know, transitioning from community college and to, you know, to going into the university, setting the average working adult and all the way to veterans.
Jeannie Lum
To date, we've made about 400 business leads in the last three years that we've been here. And for me alone, about 150 of them. And so how do I keep up with those? Right. And so what I do is I make sure I give myself like a good cadence, you know, like, because I don't want these business conversations to go in vain, even if it does not align with us.
Jeannie Lum
You never know what they're going to need, and you never know what you know, what that conversation is going to go and you know, and you never know who you're going to end up connecting that person with. All I know is that me and that person connected, and I am happy in my job to be able to be that bridge of connection, for, for for that, for that business too, whether it's you MGC or just to me or to another business, lead or business conversation that I've had, you know, and in that way, it's like we're all thriving together.
Jeannie Lum
And so, what I do is I just make sure that, you know, I give myself like, a 30, 60, 90, like, okay, like, you know, you know, say it high. It was great. Wonderful. All those wonderful meeting you send them that email and then after that, like, you know, invite them for coffee, you know, keep that connections going.
Jeannie Lum
Because again, you just never know where it's going to be. And, and, I thrive in this. I thrive in that environment of just making sure I'm connecting everybody.
Lauren Cardillo
Once again, we're listening to Jeannie Lum on Unstoppable Stories. If you want to hear more stories like Jeannie's, don't forget to like and subscribe. Following up on that, how do you not burnout? You have, you have. I won't say tentacles because that sounds evil, but do you have people you know? Your fingers in lots of different pots? How do you not burnout?
Jeannie Lum
The simple answer for me to not burn out is just to remember why I'm doing what I'm doing. I used to be a yes person. I used to say yes to every single thing, from volunteering to taking on tasks. Projects? Being there for friends, you know, me and me and just wanting to connect. Be wanting to help a person shovel through their pathway of life and everything.
Jeannie Lum
But what keeps me going is remembering why I do it. And if it doesn't make sense to me, or if it's just something that I know is not going to be life giving and or, you know, life giving back to the person that I'm serving or supporting, then, you know, then I, I have to reprioritize and I'm not getting any younger.
Jeannie Lum
I also have a family of my own. I have two daughters, and both my daughters are special needs. Both have autism. And, it definitely is a spectrum for sure. And so managing that while making sure that I continue with my passions and manage my own heart and and my love for connection, it definitely, it definitely can take a toll if I don't remember the purpose of why I am doing doing what I'm doing.
Lauren Cardillo
When one of your daughters was born, I remember you told me she was born premature and she ended up in the nick. You and you were sitting there doing work on your laptop, you know, how did you keep yourself going? That was the perfect time. If you were going to burn out, that would have been the time. How did you keep going?
Lauren Cardillo
You know, and and and almost, you know, learn a lesson from it.
Jeannie Lum
Both my daughters were born premature with my first daughter. Boy born three months early, almost three months early. And so she was, having to be in the nick. You for, for a good two, two and a half months. And, it was hard because here I am. You know, I was just in the middle of my career and I had my daughter, I did, we definitely was preparing for her, for her coming into the world, but was not prepared for her to come this early and so we talk about managing all these different things that I'm doing from volunteering to my work time.
Jeannie Lum
And, I to help me not burn out additionally. So not only remember about not only remember why I'm doing it, but also making sure that I plan and having my daughter come unexpectedly was not planned, obviously, and what do I have to do around that time? You know what? What do I do? So it was definitely a moment that taught me to ground myself.
Jeannie Lum
It was definitely a moment that humbled me. This to a point where it's just kind of like, okay, well, remember what you stand for, Jeannie, what is important to you right now? What's important to me right now is my daughter making sure. That she thrives and comes home. And so how do I do that? And you're getting all this information left, right.
Jeannie Lum
So now it's not just me. You know, I went from me going out there saying yes to everything and giving my all to everybody. And here I am on the stand still. And I have doctors. Neonatologist giving everything back to me. And I am overwhelmed with all this information, overwhelmed with all these support and resources. And when I say overwhelm, it doesn't have to mean necessarily mean something good, right or or something bad.
Jeannie Lum
It was just a lot for me, to me, to stand still in a place where I didn't know what to do. So my daughter, you know, she she is just there in her isolate with all records and just. Yeah, making sure that, you know, her heart's beating. Right. Her oxygen levels are good. And I'm just sitting there and I'm like.
Jeannie Lum
What can I do? And then I had to reground myself and I go, okay, Jeannie, what is it that is important to you? And I keep telling myself it's my daughter. How now that I know that this is this is as important to me, what's the next step? How are you going to make sure you take care of that?
Jeannie Lum
What's important to you? Okay, so I put myself back out there, stopped being on the stand still, had conversations with her, her doctors, made sure I did my read up, make sure that I took advantage of the resources that were offered to me, by the hospital at my all, at my own pace, at my own time. Because there is just a plethora of so many different things.
Jeannie Lum
But it's just what is it that I need now to help me help? What's important to me?
Lauren Cardillo
Were you also trying to to work on your laptop at the same time?
Jeannie Lum
So exactly. Yes, I was so while my daughter was there and I was at this standstill and just trying to take advantage, I was saying, okay, the show must go on. I need to continue to work. I need to continue to to make sure that I, you know, I'm still able to put food on the table. I'm still able to make sure that, you know, I were able to, you know, do the basics right, keep ourselves, get a keep a roof over our head, make sure I contribute to our household income and all that stuff.
Jeannie Lum
And so I could not stop working, actually. And so I said, okay, well, I popped up my laptop next to her, isolate and worked away, made my phone calls, and it was also equally important for me to make sure that I stayed connected because, again, what was important to me, it was my daughter was a family, but also I could not forget my passions of one stay connected.
Jeannie Lum
And so having to call, you know, the different the clients that I was working with that time and, and connecting with them and just, you know, just talking story about how's things going. And I'm still here for you. It definitely live in me up again to remember, okay, I can do this. I can still be able to manage as long as I go back to that core of what was important.
Jeannie Lum
And that's how I. I just thrived during that, that difficult time.
Lauren Cardillo
It is like a separate little universe. I spent some time in a nic you and it's like, if you don't find something from the outside, it does become very isolated. It does include, you know, like like you just said. So, you know, good for you to do that. How did it go with your second daughter? Was it okay?
Jeannie Lum
Yeah. So my second daughter was also born premature, but she was born a month early and didn't spend a long time with the Nic you. But the great thing about that is we were equipped, we were ready, we knew what resources were available, we knew what questions to ask, and I knew that I could also make sure that we kept our basics food on the table, roof overhead, mortgage paid, all that stuff all in line.
Jeannie Lum
And so, I think we were much more equipped. And my daughter, like I mentioned, it came out within two weeks and both are are thriving and healthy. And now we are, now we're, you know, dealing with a new challenge, but a beautiful challenge. And so that in itself has definitely taught me another lesson. And that is a lesson, again, of just really taking it a day at a time, because things can always be come at you unexpected.
Jeannie Lum
Things may not go as planned. And so it is important to be sure that we, take it a day at a time and with with autism, as as much of a spectrum as it is for my daughter. She's nonverbal, and she also has a, a hard time, connecting, connecting the dots. Let's just say that when she goes from A to B, it probably may go to A maybe touch on B, but I'm going to jump all the way to Z, and I'm going to go to Y and the back to A and then back to B.
Jeannie Lum
And so to be able to help her, help her in her own way, you know, make those connections just so that she can make sense of the world. I find myself grateful for having this passion of of connecting, of having this exposure to be able to understand different people, you know, in their phases of life and in their their different economic status in life and in different cultures.
Jeannie Lum
And it's definitely helped me, build bridges for, for my own, for my own daughter, even for my own family. Because, you know, it's it's short right now. I may understand her, but, you know, my parents necessarily mean I understand what she needs or or her classmates or teachers don't. So what do I do in that situation?
Jeannie Lum
What I do is I make sure that at least every month and connecting with the teachers, all the people that are providing this support, and we're all meeting and talking, okay, what does she need or what are the different things that she's doing right now? And how are we responding to those? How are we helping her connect the dots in a way that we can help her to thrive?
Jeannie Lum
As well?
Lauren Cardillo
So she's teaching you things at the same time you're trying to help her? Yes. Which, you know, applies to much of life. So how old are they now?
Jeannie Lum
My eldest daughter is ten years old and the youngest one is seven.
Lauren Cardillo
So do you do you take them out and, you know, have the advantage of living on Oahu and enjoy things there with them and see it in different lights?
Jeannie Lum
Absolutely. So and just with, you know, the curiosity of of a child is, is amazing. You know, you know, you have you have the so many children asking questions about the world, so many, you know, asking questions about like, you know, why, why, what is this? How do I do that? And sometimes it can become annoying for some of us.
Jeannie Lum
Like, are we there yet? Are we going there and everything? But at the end of the day, you know, we embrace that curiosity. And for my daughters who are nonverbal or just saying a few words, their curiosity is is explored through action, through touching, through seeing you just grounding themselves, laying down on the grass and touching the sand, being zeroed in into like a little grain of sand, especially.
Jeannie Lum
And and it's just been such a joy. Taking them out and just seeing the world differently, you know, zeroing in on things I never thought I, I would find fascinating, as they do. And it gave me a whole nother sense of connection. And hey, guess what? That's what I love doing.
Lauren Cardillo
So this all worked out?
Jeannie Lum
Definitely I think tapping I feel like, you know, things happen, things happen for a reason. And, but at the same time, too, it is important for all of us to remember what is important to us. What what is it that we we love to do? What is it? Who? Who do we love? What? What do we want out of this?
Jeannie Lum
What do we want out of the relationships that we have, the connections that we make? And while I never while I never intently sought this career journey, this life journey out, it's just amazing how, my love for connecting and, you know, just just threads through it all that makes sense.
Lauren Cardillo
Here's my last question for you, because when we talked previously, you had said to me that the ocean feels healing to you and that that's another way you're connected and grounded. So for people who don't get that about Hawaii, tell me about your love of the water and how it really encapsulates your your, your view of life, because you could be sort of a little negative, but you are not.
Lauren Cardillo
You are, you know, ready for anything. So how does the water help you?
Jeannie Lum
Definitely. I love that you asked about the water because, that is something both my daughters love. They will not stop going to the beach. And I'm trying not to get tired of it because I am on the island in this water we're surrounded with. However, to see it in their through their eyes, to see it, through through their senses and how they explore their senses definitely has opened my eyes more to the love of.
Jeannie Lum
Of the ocean. The love of the beach, love of the land. But the ocean hits different. The ocean is going to, you know, have days where it's calm and then it's going to have days where it's choppy and there will be days where the the tide is high, the tide is low, and there will be times where the currents are just hitting one another, you know, at the same time too.
Jeannie Lum
And it's just, just to just immerse myself into the water, feeling whatever flow it is and just keeping myself still and just connecting and just be like, okay, I'm I'm here. I'm going, literally going with the flow of things. But at the same time, it's like I'm still standing my ground. I'm still keeping myself, formidable, making sure that my feet is planted so that the waves don't push me as hard.
Jeannie Lum
If the water's too calm and it gets a little maybe too boring for me. I'm moving around and going with the flow. But it's the water, the movement of the water and all that. Just and just. It's. It's life. And I am just standing there being formidable and telling myself, like, yeah, I'm gonna go with the flow.
Jeannie Lum
And I know that sounds a little bit so out there, but it's, it's a true thing. And I, and I like to encourage people to just go in the water, go in the ocean and just stand there and, you know, hey, waves, bring it on. The currents, bring it on. Course. Be in a safe space. Of course. Within reach.
Jeannie Lum
But, you know, just having to challenge yourself to keep your foot planted on the ground while everything is going on around you, and then sometimes just let go and just float and just kind of hear it, feel it, and just let it take you up sometimes. And so, and that's just been the ocean has been a great analogy to my life, life lessons that I've learned.
Lauren Cardillo
I was going to say that the what the water is life, basically, you know, the ups, the downs, everything. So thank you for joining us, Jeannie. I love talking to you today. I mean, I just love your positivity and your stories. So thanks for doing that with us and for everybody listening and watching. Please remember to like and subscribe if you want to see more unstoppable stories, you can even catch up on last season or previous episodes on your preferred podcast channel.
Lauren Cardillo
See you next time! And Jeannie, thank you so much and we're all jealous that you're in Hawaii.
Jeannie Lum
Thank you so much, Lauren. Thank you everyone for listening in.